- I've had a head cold since for about 2 weeks whose symptoms have ranged from aches and chills to compulsive sneezing. It's progressed to a "productive couch." What this means is in the morning I'm a gross ball of phlegm, and I spend the rest of the day channelling my deceased grandmother coughing into a tissue and then squirrelling it away up my sleeve (or in my purse, pocket, etc.).
- If one is on a cleanse that involves a laxative, even if it's a natural, non-stimulant laxative, under no circumstances should one leave the house in the morning without pooping first. This is doubly important if you're going to engage in any type of cardiovascular activity, such as jogging.
- After harassing strangers in a coffee shop about how their baby looks like an Easter egg (note: not culturally sensitive in an area with a large Jewish population), I turned to my friend and quietly said, "I want one!" Then, not so quietly, added, "Let's steal it!" I need to work on my verbal filter and adjust the volume of what comes out of my mouth accordingly.
Just thought you'd like an update. Carry on.
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