Howdy, Neighbor!

You might think a short morning walk to the ATM and cobbler would be boring, but not when you live in my 'hood. It's amazing what types of characters you can encounter on a 15 min errand run.

• There's the poor guy being wheeled out of NYSC on a gurney sporting an oxygen mask to compliment his racket-ball whites. Oh, beyond middle-aged man, those little blue pills might make you feel like you're 25 between the sheets, but your knees can't be fooled that easily.
• A trip to the ATM - usually a solitary venture - brings us upon the homeless lady that sleeps in the vestibule. My, Lucy (she looks like a Lucy), those ski goggles really do compliment your Reebok high-tops.
• Then we run into a woman tottering down Broadway with a big, black dog (neither the woman nor the dog look entirely comfortable with their current partner) squealing to no one in particular, "Can you get to Broadway from here? Can you get to Broadway? Does anyone know?" I let her know she's on Broadway; it seems like the right thing, although I'm not sure it helped.
• And finally the Shoe Repair Guy, who persists in asking me if I'm a Russian Jew every time I go into his shop, despite my efforts to tell him my closest link to Eastern Europe is my grandmother, a Catholic Pole. He does a fantastic job with my heels, though, and I'm not particularly wedded to my religious background so being mistaken for a Jewess isn't offensive. It just makes me want a pair of diamond earrings.

Oooh, these are the people in my neighborhood, in my neighborhood, in my neigh-bor-hood...