my kind of student

Why can't I get e-mails like this? (E-mail from a student to another TA for the same class).

----- Original Message -----
From: Nice Student
Date: Mon, 15
Dec 2008 03:40:40 -0500
To: other TA
Subject: Final
Paper! On Time! Hooray!

Hello TA [name]!!!It's [Nice Student]! That Asian dude always drinkin Arizona Ice tea in your tuesday recitation...I also name my paper after Janet Jackson lyics! Anyways...It is 3:30 in the morning, and I have completely finished my Final Paper! GO Me!!!!!!!!I will definitely hand it in tomorrow, but I just wanted to e-mail it to you anyways, just in case the line for your mailbox stretches around for 2 blocks, know what im sayin?So, when we met at your office hours, I really took your advice to heart, I completely went back and re-wrote approx. 83.5% of my paper.Except for the part about fashion, clothing, and exclusivity. My last paper was very last minute, and it was rushed, and the result was poor writing. Now it is mostly completely re-written! This time it should feel more on point. I went back and I took out a lot of quotes that were not integrated well, and this time I tried very hard to integrate the quotes I left in. So the result is fewer quotes but more exposition! Your class was the highlight of my Tuesday, fare the well!Hope you have a safe, and insightful Winter VACATION!!!! WEEEEEEE!!!
[last name]

Another TA got a Christmas card! With all the Winnie the Pooh characters on the front! And 7 exclamation points!!!!! No one wished me an insightful winter vacation or gave me a card, but I did recruit one to minor in sociology. Maybe that's why they don't like me.