Yesterday I slept in and then breakfasted on multi-grain waffles toppped with honey and sliced banana while I caught up on e-mail. I worked out while watching a re-run of What Not to Wear. Then I made myself a delicious strawberry/mango/cranberry fruit and yogurt smoothie, which I enjoyed in the hot tub while reading the latest issue of Marie Claire. In the afternoon I talked to some friends and started planning an exciting trip.
All of this would have made for a fantastic day if it weren't for the underlying fact that I'm at my aunt's house taking time off from life and planning to move back East because Paul and I broke up last week. Writing about it here seems even tackier than changing my "status" on Facebook, but both are parts of my life, and I need to begin the process of moving on. Plus doing a veritable snow-chain of break-up calls isn't something I'm up to at the moment, although I do get further and further into the story without crying each time, which I think is a positive sign. My friends call to tell me they're engaged/married/pregnant/bought a condo/accepted a job offer/got a promotion/inherited an island/etc. To call and say my 5-yr relationship finally tanked, I'm broke, and moving back in with my parents for a few months is just more of judo-chop to the ego than I can handle at the moment.
Paul's a fairly private person, and a blog entry detailing the, um...details of our breakup would make him more nauseous than a 2-hr special of America's Funniest Home Videos highlighting the silly/crazy/kooky/adorable antics of children and household pets. So I will just say this: We love each other very much and care for one another deeply, but we're not making each other happy; it's just not working.
I've been overwhelmed with hugs, kisses and warm fuzzies sent via phone calls and e-mails (and have been lucky enough to receive some in person) reminding me that (1) as much as it hurts now, I will be OK, and (2) I am so lucky to have such amazing people in my life; if it meant giving up my shoes for my friends, even my two-tone suede BCBG t-strap open-toed heels, I'd do it in 1/2 a heartbeat.
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3 comments:
Oh Amy. I'm sending you lots of little cyber huggie things. And may I compliment you on perhaps the best post I've ever seen that's involved this kind of info. Well done, my most mature friend! :)
Big thanks and cyber huggies back. Plus a compliment from you is always a huge bonus; it's a delicate balance between etiquette and technology.
So sorry to hear it Amy. Lots of positive thoughts and energy coming your way. I agree with Beth, I think you're handling this quite maturely and probably says a great deal about the kind of person you are.
Kudos and good luck!
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