I fucking love American Idol. Auditions for Season 6 are being aired, and I am relishing in every second of it. Some nay-sayers are saying the criticism has gone too far and is just play mean. I say bring it on. If you’re delusional enough to come on this show with your crap voice that sounds like a banshee being eaten by a cow being run over by a truck you deserve whatever humiliation you bring upon yourself. I am geared up for the next American Idol to be discovered before my very eyes.
But I’m not sure how much more Paul Abdul I can take.
First of all, that girl is either seriously over- or under-medicated. Honestly, what the fuck is wrong with her? Get her a Zoloft and a Caffeine-Free Diet Coke.
Secondly, she is a flat out pedophile. Any remotely good looking underage guy comes in and she is sliding off her seat. Get her a change of panties and electronic ankle bracelet to go with the meds.
Point # 3 – she claps like a seal. Almost by definition one must cup one’s hands to clap. Paula’s hands are so straight they’re actually convex, and then she holds them perpendicular to her body and moves them together and apart on a perfectly horizontal plane in front of her chest. Who doesn’t know how to clap correctly?
If we’ve got to deal with her every week I think we should at least have MC Skat Kat as a guest judge one week.
But I’m not sure how much more Paul Abdul I can take.
First of all, that girl is either seriously over- or under-medicated. Honestly, what the fuck is wrong with her? Get her a Zoloft and a Caffeine-Free Diet Coke.
Secondly, she is a flat out pedophile. Any remotely good looking underage guy comes in and she is sliding off her seat. Get her a change of panties and electronic ankle bracelet to go with the meds.
Point # 3 – she claps like a seal. Almost by definition one must cup one’s hands to clap. Paula’s hands are so straight they’re actually convex, and then she holds them perpendicular to her body and moves them together and apart on a perfectly horizontal plane in front of her chest. Who doesn’t know how to clap correctly?
If we’ve got to deal with her every week I think we should at least have MC Skat Kat as a guest judge one week.
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