Mother Nature is a vengeful C*nt

Things started looking not so good when Paul’s flight was delayed 1 hr 15 min before he left for the airport. I went into the dermatologist for a quick, annual mole scan (“the quantity is concerning, you gotta come in every year, but the quality, the quality I’m seeing today is excellent” – if only all my Doctors’ appointments were this easy). When I came out I talked to Paul again and his flight was delayed until 8pm. That was crap b/c it put him on the red-eye, which he was trying to avoid by taking the 2pm flight in the first place, and it means he took a full day off from work for no reason. By the time I emerged from K-mart, having purchased a heating pad for Jane, 2% milk and Honey Bunches of Oats for Paul, and a Kit-Kat for me (I was already feeling a little down, but I did resist the Mint Chocolate covered Oreos) Paul was calling me to say his flight was canceled. Fuck fuck fuckity fuck fucker. Shit. Fuck.

Fly out Friday? Not unless he wanted to risk going through Chicago, which the airline personnel did not recommend. But he needs to be back in SD by Wednesday, so by the time he hypothetically got here Saturday we’d have about 72 hrs. Poo. Big stinky yucky poo. Long story short, he’s coming in 2 weeks. So help me god, if the weather gods try to fuck with me then I will haul my fat (but increasingly taught) white ass to JFK with a hairdryer and extension cord and make that place fit to fly my g-d self. Grr. [t-minus 10 days to P-day, apparently the “pissy” part is kicking in.]

I, of course, handled the news like a big girl. I cried, but I took my contacts out before too long so they wouldn’t turn into relentlessly adhesive pieces of saran wrap (very adult). I uncorked the bottle of Lambic Pêche MMR brought over last week and drank it straight from the bottle (only grow-ups can legally drink alcohol). I then pouted and cried and quibbled unintelligibly to Paul. I may have even kicked my feet a little whilst blubbering “it’s not fair.” That last bit was a little childish, but I recognize the difference, an obvious sign of maturity.

I then engaged in some moderate wallowing, but I think it was justified. Bad things that have happened this month (in chronological order):

• SBK’s friend dying – world loses great defense attorney
• Thinking JJJ had cancer
• SBK reporting back on the continued dire state of NOLA
• Steph not getting to come visit b/c of her butt-munch megalomaniac professor dumb fuck
• Having a 2nd abnormal pap result [TMI warning: This means a 2nd cervical biopsy, and if there was one thing I could do with never experiencing more than once it was having my hoo hoo snipped)
• Having to cancel a weekend with Paul I was really looking forward to
  

Enter SBK and Bec to the rescue! They called to check how puffy I was from crying and told me I had 45 minutes to get dressed and mitigate the blotchyness. I started to think a little more positively. Good things that have happened this month (again, in chronological order):

• SBK coming back – I missed her! – and moving into an amazing apartment
• My students pro-actively researching class topics and then sharing their info with me
• JJJ not having cancer – yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay fungus!
• Paul getting permission to travel (Immigration stuff)
• My uncles visiting and taking me to a delicious restaurant
• Steph feeling Li’l Spins moving around insider her
• Getting a great mix CD from Beth in her ingenious CD swap
• Unexpected request for help with a wedding speech – very flattering
• Little reminders about how lucky I am to have such wonderful friends
  

And, trying to maintain a more optimistic outlook, bull-frog eyes the morning after a good cry make an excellent pallet for eye-liner.